Thursday, December 29, 2011

33 Hour more end of 2011

Could not believe this year will be celebrating without you by myside.


33 more hours i will erase everything.


At least i can see both of us are happily moving forward with our life
isnt it? hee hee hee I am happy actually....But i also feel sad....For some reason i
dont know why.....?! why?! I could nt get the answer , Maybe u felt the same too? Do u?


Fck Fck Fck plz Dun emo again GARY LEE!!! Felt much better release it on my blog LOL!!

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

What done is done , I know i cant let go , I will make u hate me alot until cant bcome friends , So that the only way for me to let go . Is pain for me doing like this , Nobody know , Only i know , self know , U know? i dont think so...

Therefore keep meeting each other just will make me fall for u...If become friends? what will it be? Worst.... U should understand. Caring a person who doest love u and hate u just will make thing worst. I finally understand reason why ppl said long term relationship after break can't be friends. From what u see I look like hv a problem. If u dun wan a relationship just cut it , dun show emotion , and keep yr distance so will u keep my respect for u!

I want focus on my life .
Just let it be.... Even ENEMY. HATE me Dont be SOFT , OR i will fall again.
Everything u did even u don't have motive , I will feel like what u trying to do have motive to be together , when I comes u cut me in to half, I guess I was trying too hard and desperate to protect u, I gave love but I get abused , sometimes I do feel I am naive , I give but I dont like the feel being used , is true u feel I am selfish , Hw selfish I am compare to u ? Am I selffish enough to pay back revenge like you did? U said u understand love, really?? u said u went to ns I dint look for u , dint call u , how can I call since yr hp keep by teacher, during Sunday I can't even move a feet, how can I take off? Yes I do miss u a lot do u realize that? I wait for u 3month! When I was infected by chicken pox what u did? Revange? I m terribly sick lying on bed can't eat and sleep with skin full of pox , is that suffer then going ns? Have u ever realize ? REALIZE?
Every love story has an ending , I guess our end up like this. I dont hate you , I m regret seriously , I m regret bcuz thing should be better. U are not the person I knew long ago the 1st time I meet. Just like 2 person. At least is a great experience and growing up

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

September 29

She msg ,
Although hv feel... but i m not going try again.
Bcuz its just going to hurt myself back again.



Sooner or later will forget her,
All i need is time.
Even i cant forget,I just let it be even i love her does not mean have to be together.
Focus on my future and set it free.
I can do it.!!

Saturday, September 24, 2011

Just a Dream.

This few week everytime i sleep i dream about her. i was like WTF....
But i tell myself is over.

what i gave to her,
I never hope or request to take back anything from her or belong to her.

I just want to spend my time with her,
See her thats all.

She might think i want something from her,
But is ok... (this is how i felt)

I am not going back to hurt and torture myself again.
This few week i been able to set back my track and goals.

Writing my feeling here really make me much more relief.
Well i guess i am human and i hv feelings.
Thanks to her cruelness ,
I told myself i will rise and successs,
I will show u what i got.
I wont fall.
I get back my respect and my pride.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Finally I ma getting bck my routine :)

Been sleep too long and I m awaken, I will achieve my goal,

Thursday, September 15, 2011

September 16

Someday if u read my blog ,
I want to let u know...
Inside myself i dont have hate,angry and jealousy.

I might do alot of thing that upset u in past.

I might look like happy,
I might look like ntg happen,
But inside nobody knows..

But i never gave up hope......

I will move forward
And be successful in life.

Hope u will found a better person.

I just want to give the best of me .

I dont wish much,
I dont hope much,
I dont want anything from you.

I just wan to see your smile.
I am not a perfect person,
But i do know that my love for u is real.

Although is over now.
I will be a better person in future
.....

In future even if i pretend i do not know u.
Please forgive me.....
This is the best way i can do for both of us.

I am sorry....
I am not a perfect guy.

15september

Got exam paper tips for her frm my mmu friend, but ..... is ok, let it be.
Everything I do I nvr ask or hope for reward.
Is hurt .....
Think bck everytime break I m the one who contact bck,
But u getting into new relationship ,maybe is true u r nt the one for me,
This is u, I can't change u, mayb for u 2 -3year is ntg n boring already.
Fresh relationship will always feel good.

Saturday, September 10, 2011

....September 14

The more i care the more i hurt....

is like love a doll that dont hv emotion,

My six sense told me already over....
Wont be the same again,

U already forget everything....
I feel so pain, But to know the fact and the truth.

I will accept it and moving forward starting today.


(Everything has to end before the new can begin)

I will remind myself.
I will accept the Fact and swallow it.

Thursday, September 8, 2011

不值得, 我不应该考虑回我所作出的决定.
但我很高兴,我完成,我已经作出答应你的承诺.
为你所做的一切都是用我的心。。。
我不怪你,自尊???收回. 爱?你永远不会明白.

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Haiz....

Sometimes wish to console you,
But i cant do too much,
Sometimes i wish to by on your side when you really need it,
But i m affraid will just make you go further away from me.

All i can do is pray for you.....
No one can understand this pain...

Only i do.
All i wan is to see yr smile even on the picture is enough...

Sunday, September 4, 2011

To know how to appriciate , we need to go through sadness

Actually since past, We quarrel or any bad thing happened between us, i never keep in my heart...

All i do is forgive , Bcuz i truely love u with my heart...

i remembered once i drunk at movida,
And i push u....Almost hit u....

But when i m awaken, my hearts feel really pain bcuz of what i had done to the one thats i really love....

I do hope u forgive me.
Is a sin....

Since then i promised myself i wont go drunk again....

I cant believe it... when i facing love i am weaker then i tho...
U are stronger then i was.

Friday, September 2, 2011

letting go

Today johnson friend calling,
Ask me wan join him onot.....
Hard to make decision

Even if salary are highger but i cant just go like that.

Lets pray hope `God show me the road`

Thursday, September 1, 2011

If there is one more chance...I will love u right.

Work hard for so long...

Hope my salary will rise again.
I need more money lol....

Gastric....

Walao eh @#$%^&*()

Having gastric is like hving a baby ...
Always kick me awake during midnight hour.....
Hope will fast recover, cant sleep well.... :(

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

September (Back to the basic)

Its time to get bck fit and more charming. Wohooo GYM GYM! ?
This month goin for laser resurfacing, wish me luck! ! Can't
Wait to build up my muscle and hope can buy
new car honda city for nxt year target. =)
I m coming! !

Monday, August 29, 2011

Breaking up with someone you care about is one of the toughest decisions any of us will ever have to go through. Dealing with the pain and heart break is never easy. We just have to live the days as they are set out and not live in the past

A tear comes to mind, when I think of you
And remember the time when our friendship was new.
A gentle smile centered on your face,
And I knew that then was the time and place,
To kiss you, I did and felt a tick back in my heart.
I thought we'd be forever and never part,
But now we have come to a fork in the road,
Where we must no longer carry each other's load,
Let the burden off our shoulders and not leave a scar,
For the paths we are taking are very far apart.
I will remember always the places we went,
And cherish forever the time we've spent.
So now is the time where I say goodbye,
Spend one last minute lost in your eyes.
As much as I know that we can't stay,
I hope our paths will cross again some other day

Sunday, August 28, 2011

。。。

She said i am lazy always take mc...
Do u know since small i hv blood bone problem...
Have u ever tried to understand me...?

I really jealous those ppl who can stand so long...

Really hurt..

28 August 2011

I will remember...
Every single word from your mouth are so poison and so mean.....Really hurt...
I come back with Full heart and want to build up our mistake in past for both of us ,
I put down my pride and everything , this 2 month i changed , i Builded my carrier and everything and i come back just to ensure u be happier then previous. People grow and people made mistake, U just dont understand!!!
After 2 years will hv a big semi-D house for us, And my job life is getting better and better , I just need u by myside thats all, U dont understand!!! AT ALL!!! TO U ALL IS ABOUT PAST!!! FCUK IT!!! U WONT UNDERSTAND AND WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND WHAT I WAS TRYING TO DO FOR BOTH OF Us!


But u break everything into dust.
I am so wrong about u, I will remember....August 28 2011

Congratulation Ur revange succeed.

This PAIN!!! I remember for my life , I will not do such idiot thing again.


And thank U!!
My life wont down bcuz of this i just will grow stronger!









Saturday, August 27, 2011

想给你最好的我 就算只是朋友

信不过别人把你追走 也信不过自己暂时把你拥有
做朋友 是保护你 最坏也是最好的藉口
不如不见 记得以前和你分享我的担心
烦恼还有我的骄傲
但现在我们之间却变得越来越有礼貌
When we broke up
你的朋友一定拍手说好
现在你身边的他们大概都不喜欢我
但是我还是我 我还一样地活
The reason why 我决定离开There is Only One Reason
Why Coz I know you deserve better and more
没了我大家信不过的那个星座
你一定要好好生活 别想太多为什么我写了这首歌 只想用心对你说
I love you and I still do I love you now
But It is just in a different way if I may
Hey Be sure I know you used to love me more (appreciate)
But now as a friend
.

August 27

Cold weather and blue sky today, feel like msg u , invite u out , and ask how are u
What u doing.... but I m affraid being rejected and my msg u will feel anouying , bcuz I know u will choose go
Out with yr friend, not me.

I should get busy...and not think about it.
Good night

Thursday, August 25, 2011

August 2011

August 23, afternoon I went to dp to buy present for somebody, while walking alone inside dp , everything recall bck on my mind, I remember I promised to buy her watch and celebrates with her. I smiled and go inside the shop and start choosing , during that time I really out of budjet to buy a watch over rm 200 , but those memories recall back ...

Past:
Me:hey dear.... u like to wear watch but why always wear cheap watch. .

Her:is ok, branded thing vry expensive , cheap thing but look nice is ok to me, and I don't mind wear cheap watch as long as I like it.

Me: haha... (speak to myself someday I will buy u better watch..)

When buying I got two option. Rm109 and 268 but 109 look nt really nice n no bling bling inside So I decide to take 268, lucky got discount if not I goin to eat sand .

During night time... then begin our meeting after 2 and a half month break up....I maybe I m stupid enuff to do back those thing , but I just know that I love her ..love is blind right? =)

So I went to fetch her, and begin some casual chat In Side my car, everything goes well, until we reached klebang sunset bar... after dinning we chat abit about our past...and suddenly the waiter bring out my cake that I brought to her for tonight birthday countdown celebration, And her eye begin to tear... my heart feel so pain , I don't know why I m in pain... bcuz my plan tonight is to watch her smile..(Forgive me if my english is broken) , but I m glad she happy.
After 12am is August 24 and I still remember is her special day...I wanted too ....
But something went so wrong that night....
My feeling is getting heavy and heavier...
Before our night ends I just wanted to gv her another surprice, but thing doest go smoothly.... I want to giv her roses,present and purpose to her. . But she reject to folo me and folo another guy who wanted to chase her. During that time somethin appear on my mind was. ... everythinv already changed only I m the one that not yet changed.

Maybe I am not importaint and dint exist in your heart anymore. Someday.... if u read this blog , I hope u understand my heart to u is real.... although everything is too late ... Sorry...
if only I can go back to the past.

Chicken Pox!!

I been infected by chicken pox and that really ruined my face ,
Its been 3 month although look much better but still got some scar ,
Although is not deep but still hurt me alot T___T ,
But doctor told me i can fix it ehehehe.... So i can get my skin back even better,
All i need is MONEHHHHH~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
RM600 1 time(Laser Resurfacing).... Phew really hurt my wallet badly. But its worth it after doing some research. And is malacca best skin doctor so should be ok right? :)

Wish me luck

Hehehe I m Back`

Is been 1 years back then, I continue wrote back my blog to get rid of my daily life anger, and throw those real emotion of my in here , Bcuz in real world u just cant share it , ppl will think i am NUTS!! Phew~ Maybe some of u guys will feel digust about my blog but feel free , I dint write to gv people see anyway.